Testify with Boldness

Fleming Island/Orange Park

Dear Family & Friends~

I'm glad to hear your Easter weekend went well and that you were able to enjoy yourselves and also remember the good times from the past. It is kind of funny, lately I've been getting baseball and football dreams, some nightmares, others slightly less burdening, and others happier--I'm not sure why they are popping up, especially since it isn't like I'm thinking about sports, only in passing do the thoughts come. Perhaps because of spending my entire life playing sports it is difficult for my mind to forget. Who knows. I do notice that the dreams have been showing a gradual change, however, from miserable dreams to happier dreams. Maybe it is a symbol of me letting go of my negative experiences and learning to focus on the better times. I can see that as being true and my dreams aren't fully positive yet because at times I still slip into the habit of remembering the difficulties rather than the joy of it all.

Elder Kiracofe and I are getting along well. He is definitely one of the funnier companions I've had, but for the greater part, he is a very focused missionary. He didn't come to waste time! Which is good because it is nice to be around a motivated person. Interestingly enough, I've noticed that those whom I've been surrounded by are rather cheerful people. In fact, the majority of my District, and even Zone, is filled with missionaries who love to enjoy themselves, but also work hard. The overall attitude of these missionaries is pleasantly optimistic. It feels as though each of us are changing and letting go of the old and allowing the new, happier spirit into our lives. We are unifying little by little. It is powerful to see how things are gradually changing in the mission. I don't know how it works, but the Lord knows what He is doing. So does President Barry.

For Easter we went to a member's home in the other Fleming Island ward. The Kelly's are a great family. They have a couple of kids, one on a mission to South America somewhere and they have living with them another Sister in the ward and her son. They love the missionaries and it is their tradition to always have the missionaries over for ALL the holidays, if possible, especially Easter. We had a great time with them and really enjoyed their company. Also, Brook and Jonathan brought us over a dinner later that evening. I love their family too. It is amazing to see the example they are setting for their family and for the changes that are taking place in their lives. There is an aura of happiness that shines around them. You can see the peace that they feel and their faith is evident. Their son, Michael, and might I add Jonathan as well, received the Aaronic Priesthood a couple Sundays ago. Jonathan was ordained a Priest and was able to ordain his son to a Deacon. Michael passed the sacrament for the first time yesterday. He was a little apprehensive because of the large crowd that came to church, but he did a great job.

...I remembered a quote from Joseph Smith where he said we should pray like it all depends on God and then go out and work like it all depends on us. I think that is the relationship Heavenly Father is trying to build with me, to help me understand it does all depend on Him; however, whether He will work the miracle depends all on my faith and diligence: it is a team effort. In a similar sense it is like asking the other roommates to help clean up as though it entirely depended on them to keep the apartment clean, then to turn around and do every possible thing I can to help keep it clean as well--and then continually reminding them of my need for their support, as well as my continual effort in keeping the place clean. It is the process of uniting independent minds on a single purpose and goal. Seems to me kind of like a marriage of sorts...but then again, I'm not married, so I may not fully understand.

Anyways, I think Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ want me to know that I can count on Them and that if I will trust in Them and do as They ask, I will always be able to rejoice.

Our "finding" is on the upswing. I am learning more effectively how to invite others to learn about the gospel. It can be difficult at times to understand how to relate with people in a powerful way that will help them to feel the truth of the gospel in merely a few seconds. God wants us to rely on the Holy Ghost to testify of His gospel and not to use many words, but to be simple and sincere in brief testimony so the Spirit can shoot straight to the heart of the individual and cause them to feel the truth. We are learning as a mission that it isn't up to us whether or not someone will become converted, but it is up to them, and whether or not they will receive the Spirit we invite. No number or combination of words, no amount of logic, nothing save the Holy Ghost can penetrate the heart in a way that would cause someone to be converted. Up to this point, I haven't understood that principle as well as I thought, and I think to a degree it is one of the reasons "finding" has always been a difficult thing for me to do, but now I am starting to see that God doesn't want me to convince them, He wants me to testify with sincerity and boldness, but simply and briefly so the Holy Ghost can convince them. In consequence of that relationship, it is so important for us to be exactly obedient so we can receive our own knowledge and testimony of the doctrine so we can also testify with greater sincerity and power. I am starting to see President Barry's game plan. He is wanting us to go out and work to convert others, but in so doing, he is helping us to become converted. Mind you, this is a gradual thing!! But it is working. :)

I love each of you and wish you a happy week and look forward to speaking with you again on Mother's Day!

Love~

Austin